- Drive up to the plane. This means you can arrive 5 minutes before your flight. Even if you are perpetually late, the plane will wait for you. The epitome of being fashionably late.
- Always have an aisle or window seat. More importantly, there will not be a person in the middle to make going to the restroom awkward or, heaven forbid, steal your armrest.
- Use the restroom without fear of there being a line. There is nothing worse than being on a flight, and after making that terrible walk down the aisle with everyone awkwardly staring as you, just for you to have stand and wait in line for the restroom. It is not as if you can go back to your seat to wait and then put yourself through that awkward walk all over again.
- Precious companions are welcomed. No need to rush to get that online “companion animal” certification. All furry friends are welcomed, but don’t get crazy thinking you can bring your tiger.
- Play music or watch a movie with or without headphones. This is a luxury without you know it is a luxury because have you ever gotten on a plane and forgot your headphone or they die? Nothing, worse than not being able to binge Westworld, and being forced to listen to all those commercial airplane sounds.
- Have a conversation without everyone sitting within a 10-foot radius listening to you. Privacy is key. You have the ability to hold private conversations and even important meetings without nosey Nancy listening in.
- You will not have to subjugate yourself to body scanner radiation. Ok, it is not “officially” confirmed the amount of radiation you get from going through a scanner, but not having to get any would be pretty great. Besides when you opt of the TSA body scanner, you get the overly friendly agent touching you in front of strangers. Let’s just say, we would like to avoid the whole situation. Thanks.
- Full size toiletries. Yes, I said it full-size. Ok, maybe this is only a plus to women. As someone who has forgotten to put their perfume in their checked-lugged and was forced to watched a TSA agent throw a brand-new bottle of Chanel Number 5 in a bin, know the pain is real. I do not know much about terrorists, but if they are hiding explosives in Chanel Number 5 bottles, we have way bigger issue on our hands.
- Your luggage is with you the whole time. No need to worry about lost, stolen or damaged luggage. They say don’t pack your valuables, but we all do it. The panic going through your head as you watch everyone grab their luggage and you are still waiting there thinking, “they were behind, I should have it by now”. The relief that comes over your soul when the bag finally comes through makes the wait worth it, unless it doesn’t.
- You choose who flies with you. It is not as elitist as is sounds. You know you have thought about it. Waiting in that slow-moving boarding line, and you see that one person (you know who I am talking about) and think, “I hope they are not next to me”. Do not kid yourself, if you had the choice you’d prefer to pick who flies with you.
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